Think I just saw a fox run across the road, or it was a cat that looked like a fox, either way I dislike foxes a little bit after watching a documentary about the twins who were attacked in their own home. Although, really, I dislike the woman who lives in the neighbourhood, she attracts the foxes by feeding them, and she feeds them because she likes seeing foxes.
WTF? You fucking weirdo. Stop feeding wild animals and get a cat or something.
I bought some ‘Monkeys and Bananas’ from Tesco today. In hindsight this was a bad idea, for one thing, I had no monkeys in my packet of sweets -before you say/think anything, there were meant to be monkeys in them (foamy, jelly monkeys) and another thing, the bananas are shit.
I really like foam bananas. They’re amazing. Fake banana flavouring? YES PLEASE. Tesco bananas smell like awesome foam bananas, but they taste like, I dunno…gelatine ? What does that taste like? OMG I just read the pack and it’s Pork geletine, and it has APPLE concentrate in it. Where are the bananas? Where are the fake bananasssss???
It says ‘no artificial flavours’, which is the essence of foam bananas. So if you like foam bananas, don’t buy Tesco bananas.
Ohh..now I’ve just spilt the pack everywhere….BANANARAMA!!
So done all my uni coursework, I have three exams starting in like four days. I’ve barely done any revision and I’m blatantly not going to get a first anymore. My last two coursework essays have pulled my marks right down, which is a pile of shit, who puts two essay hand in dates the day before your dissertation is in. I mean FFS.
I’ll need to get firsts in all my exams to get a first overall, and seeing as counselling is a pile of fucking balls that had pretty much no teaching, it’s not going to happen.
So gutted. I barely want to try anymore. This is SHIT.
The other morning I filed, buffed and polished my nails, as they were the longest they’ve been for ages -proud moment. Today -after one afternoon of revision they’re mostly gone. I hate stress, and worry. Bite bite bite fuck off.
I really don’t get, also, why the man on the check out in Tesco can’t comprehend the fact that if you have a horizontally packaged lasagne; you don’t pack it vertically. I’ve told him twice before, and today I was not in the mood. I gave him my tone of voice, and asked ‘Can you not do that’ (doesn’t sound too menacing but it’s all in the tone), and when he asked me if I had a club card I said ‘No’ as if in someway I was getting back at him. I wasn’t going to inconvenience myself finding my club card just because he asked me. Dick.
So I’m home now, and I’ve eaten way too many Kettle chips, I feel so freaking sick. Blerh.
Ordering Pizza Hut online made me cry.
That’s why it sucks being a girl. Or moreso just having hormones will do it.
As you can probably see from the amount I have blogged, I haven’t been out the house that much recently -although you would have thought it would be the opposite? Went to Tesco today and saw these:
Packs of LEMON only French Fancies.
What the fuck Mr. Kipling.
I mean seriously. Why would anyone want this. Fair enough all PINK or CHOCOLATE packs but LEMON?!?! I can’t even think of anyone who would want to buy this, I mean who likes lemon French Fancies…apart from my dad, but to be fair he likes the pink and chocolate ones too, I doubt he’d want six lemon ones. Variety is the spice of life.
On another note a bar has opened in The Printworks called Illusions, it plays cool music, has a cool vibe, and has MAGICIANS. Went on Friday night (Last night?) with Will, Jonny, and Becky, I think Jonny had a stroke when the magician swallowed a balloon. It was pretty much us and the staff cause it was getting late, it was like a private show. Wicked. Cheered me up – sad ’cause I was tired and grumpy after napping (minor fml there).
Right, so…(do I always start my blogs like that? I’m not sure, I think I try not too)…annnyway got some money for christmas so thought I better spend it QUICK! (it was starting to burn a hole in my pocket -and my minnnnnd!). Came back to manchester after a great christmas with my family, and an awesome new year too -1920′s eat your heart out. My costume was the tits!
The sky was mental bright that night, it was like white and orange at the same time. Will and I were like it’s so totally going to snow yah, and we were so right. There’s about a bajillion inches. O RLY?
YA RLY!!
Well about 6? Or something? About a cocks worth? I duno. Being the numpty I am, I obviously didn’t pack my wellies, and I couldn’t drive to my house and get them cause my car was an igloo. Decided to go shopping anyway, armed with my ski jacket and now overly popular russian furry hat (I so bought mine last year, I can’t really claim I wore it first, I’m pretty sure that was the Russians…sneaky Russians). Erm yeah…so….SHOPPING.
Esprit let me down, pastel colours SRSLY?, don’t you know I’m like your best customer and pastels aren’t in my colour chart!?! No purchases there then. Republic did me proud but only the new stock, got some awesome checked shorts (to go with my ugg boots), and a slurple purple hoodie (cause it’s so cold), I wuvs them! Surfed a few other shops, and thought I’d try USC cause I still had £60 of me spends. Found the most nom firetrap tshirt (probs my best buy), and another one in the sale which I had my eye on yonks ago, the one I had previously seen was black but this one was red, bingo! as it complied with my new wardrobe rules = MORE COLOUR! Then I ran out of money. Damn.
Oh I just remembered why I wrote this blog…I was gonna tell you a story about how the shorts in Repulic were on a really high clothes rail and I got cramp in my foot trying to reach up to get them down. I was gonna rant about how they must only want 6ft 2 girls to buy these shorts, but I fucked the system! In your face Republic! I’m 5ft 5!
Okay, so I’ve been meaning to blog this for a while. Essentially another rant, but, anyway, I was in the MMUnion for a usual meet up with friends for lunch, and in the SU you have to buy the ketchup (which in itself is worth a rant) for 10p a sachet. I was reading the ingredients on the back of the sachet, and I was pretty shocked about what it contained, or more what it ‘may contain’.
Here we go:
Ingredients: Water, Glucose-Fructose, Syrup, Tomato Paste (15%), Modified Maize Starch, Salt, Acidity Regulators (x2 E numbers), Preservative (x1 E number), Spice extracts.
So out of the ingredients only 15% is tomato, and not even real tomatoes, it’s tomato PASTE. Blerh.
Caution: MAY CONTAIN nuts, peanuts, seasame seeds, mustard, celery, FISH, eggs, milk, soybeans, sulphites, cereals containing gluten.
What the hell?! I’ll stick to me heinz please, least that actually tastes tomatoey.
So after writing my complaint letter (about the piece of bone in my chicken nugget) to McDonalds, they wrote back with an apology and three £5 vouchers, not bad going really! However, after getting another meal from McDonalds a few days later I found another piece of bone in my chicken nugget. I haven’t been to that McDonalds since, I think it’s pretty disgraceful. I don’t even want to spend my free vouchers there!
On a happier note, I’ve finished all my exams! I get my results on July 12th, which is a bit nerve wrecking. I don’t really want to know what I got.
I had a great time camping the other weekend, bacon butties every morning, looking after my little second cousins, awesome BBQ, camp fire songs, general cousin love, and incredible sunburn!
I’ve also bought a new camera! It’s the same as my old one so not much to report there, but it’s great having a camera again.
Will and I also booked a holiday to Altea, Spain For the end of July for a couple of weeks, just a shame I now have no money to buy holiday clothes or much else! Oh well I don’t need many clothes to get a tan 
Francis has yet again been assaulted. Francis being my very gay Fiat Punto. Someone’s decided it would be good to smack him in the head and crack his windscreen. Hopefully my halls carkpark will have the offender on CCTV. Bastards though, spose it’s what you get for living next to a fleet of council estates.
Rang my insurance and because it’s a bank bloody holiday, I can’t even make an appointment until Tuesday to get it fixed. Only a £50 excess though, and they’re ordering me a Fiat windscreen on my request, unlike my back passenger window which is some other make -I hate it when things don’t match 
Such an inconvenience though! I wish people would stop targetting my car. This is so because I broke a mirror last year, 6 more years of bad luck…damn.
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